COMCASTIC Price Reductions!

Today, my Comcast combined cable internet and television bill went from $122.18 to $136.69 when they raised their 2007 prices and when my "we know our prices are too high" promotion ran out.

What's a "we know our prices are too high" promotion? It's the promotion you get when you call Comcast and tell them their prices are too high. It lasts for 6 months, and you must call to renew it at the end of the 6 month period. The conversation goes something like this (minus a lot of smalltalk about Christmas):

Adam: Hello, I'm calling because I noticed the monthly amount on my bill for the upcoming billing period is increasing from $122 to $137, and I'd like to understand what's going on.

Comcast Rep 1: My guess is you had a promotion that expired.

Adam: Yeah, that sounds right. About half a year ago I called you guys because a previous promotion I had then had expired, and the price for your services were just too expensive. Your cable internet service before taxes is $46/month, but Qwest's DSL service is only $27/month. The person I spoke to then gave me another promotional discount to keep me from looking around at other services.

Comcast Rep 1: Oh but you're not seeing the big picture. DSL is barely faster than dialup, and there are outages all the time [Comcast never has outages]. A girl here used to work for Qwest, and she says Comcast is much better, and that you only get fast speeds if you're 500ft away because of all the noise.

Adam: (giggling) I see. Well, I sorta work with these technologies for a living, and that's just not the case. Qwest does have a 7mbps DSL service for $37/month, that's still $10/month less than you.

Comcast Rep 1: Well my son plays video games, and they really need the high speeds, if you do this for a living you probably know that already. We all have decisions to make, but you should really look at the big picture.

Adam: Look, the bottom line is that my bill went up from $122 to $137 for service that has stayed the same and is already overpriced. If you can get the price down, I'll say thank you, hang up the phone, and be happy. If you can't, just tell me, and I'll call up Qwest or any of the other dozens of ISPs and get a much cheaper new customer introductory offer from them instead.

Comcast Rep 1: Okay, just a minute and I'll get you over to the department that can help you out.

Comcast Rep 2: Hi, what can I do for you?

Adam: [I explain the situation again]

Comcast Rep 2: Well, I see here you did have a promotional offer and it just expired. I can apply that now for another 6 months for you.

Adam: That'd be great. Also, what's the difference between "Digital Classic" and "Digital Plus"?

Comcast Rep 2: Oh, Digital Plus has a lot more channels and only costs $4/month more.

Adam: Like what channels?

Comcast Rep 2: Toon Disney, The Military Channel, [...], the MTVs and VH1s.

Adam: Is that all of the MTVs and VH1s? Or just some extra ones?

Comcast Rep 2: It's MTV Hits, MTV Jams... just the extra ones...

Adam: I see. I'd like to change to Digital Classic as well.

Comcast Rep 2: Ok I can do that for you, and if you miss any channels you can just call us back.

Adam: Great.

Comcast Rep 2: Have a Merry Christmas!

Adam: You too!

In short, my bill is now over $15/month less, thanks to my brand spankin' new "we know our prices are too high" promotion. I don't have any of the following channels, but I don't think I'll miss them too much:

122 Toon Disney
127 Nick Too
139 LOGO
180 NFL Network
201 Discovery Home Channel
203 DIY
204 Fine Living
222 FIT TV
231 I-Life TV
271 Discovery Times
274 The Military Channel
275 The Biography Channel
276 History Channel International
471 CMT Pure Country
472 MTV Hits
475 MTV Jams
504 Lifetime Movie Network
505 Sundance Channel
513 IndiePLEX
514 RetroPLEX
516 Encore WAM!
519 Encore Love
521 Encore Mystery
523 Encore Westerns
527 Encore Drama
529 Encore Action
606 MTV Tr3s

So call 1-800-COMCAST today, and get your "we know our prices are too high" promotion! If you're feeling ballsy, you can even remind them how their $77/month cable TV compares to DirecTV's $40/month 12-month introductory offer ("oh but satellites have outages all the time")!